Any advice?

So, my ex-boyfriend and I broke up yesterday, which is still really fresh. To clarify, we were together for 6 months, and I was literally planning to see him this month for his birthday, but of course that didn’t happen. Around the second month, I had to move to California, and that really took a toll on us. At first, we were so happy and in love, but that’s when things started going downhill. He was controlling and insecure at times, which I didn’t mind at first because I was okay with reassuring him. But then it kept getting worse. He would say hurtful things, and then I would respond with hurtful things too. It was really draining. I know that’s not an excuse, and I’m not going to act like I was an angel, but despite everything, we still really loved each other. He used to say he would never leave me—but he did. And now I feel so stupid for trying so hard, because he gave up so easily. I thought he truly cared, and it feels like I wasted my time. Now I keep wondering if he’ll come back, or if it’s really over. I don’t know what to do. I really miss him, but at the end of the day, it was his decision, not mine. I know I need to move forward, but I just don’t know how.