This has been a long year

IV been separated from my wife for almost a year now. It’s been tough to say the least. The hardest part was watching her date and knowing she slept with other people. I don’t want to sound like a hypocrite but she kinda forced me to go see other people too. I hated every moment of it. Because she was the one I wanted to be with and no one else. For 6 years I never even looked at another woman . She was the love of my life and our separation crushed me. Somehow we got back together after everything we went through but my self worth wasn’t there anymore. I feel like I got back with her to satisfy my ego but once that initial hunnymoon feeling was gone I felt empty in the inside. It doesn’t help that things with us didn’t feel the same anymore either. She treated me different. Not bad just differently. We tried for a few months but things did t end up working out and now we’re looking at getting divorced. It gusts but I know in the end it’s what’s best for me and our kids. We can’t keep brining them in the middle of this just to satisfy our selfish needs