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cheeryhellohd1bv
9mo ago
Vent

help

I’m 18 and just got out of a two-year relationship with someone I truly thought I’d marry. He broke up with me right before we both left for university — different cities, different lives. He said he loved me, but not the way I loved him. That it didn’t feel like a rollercoaster - a feeling he wanted and that my love was warm and gentle, but he wanted that rollercoaster feeling. The hardest part is knowing he felt like this for months and still stayed. I don’t know if I was led on, or if he just didn’t know how to leave. He said it was also because of his own commitment and attachment issues, and that he wished it was me. I don’t know how to move forward. I keep reading into things — his music taste, his social media, everything. I’ve changed so much in this relationship. I miss him. But I’m scared I wasn’t enough. That maybe I’ll never be enough for anyone. Was I led on? How do I stop hoping he’ll come back? And how do I move on without trying to become someone else entirely?

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1 reply

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splendidholdzj0suv9mo ago

I’m so sorry this happened to you. I am older (58) but I remember my first love and I broke it off with him but wanted him back when I saw him again a few weeks later and he was seeing someone else and said no. It was all very painful for me. I realized later on that he was all wrong for me and it was a purely personality issue. I have a firm belief that two people can be good together only if their personalities mesh. They could be the two most beautiful people on earth both physically and mentally, but their personalities clash and they are just not meant to be together. I’m not saying that’s your case, but this helped me. I still feel pain from it after all these years. No one I was ever with after him was as good as he was in my mind still, but I know now we had different personalities and he just didn’t understand what I was about I think. Back then I was so young that I didn’t know either, but I do now. I did love people after him some very intensely, but all ended up being bd relationships for various reasons

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