ache

i can’t help but look through our old conversations. we were together almost 3 years and it’s october which is the month we fell in love. everyday is another “one year ago today” of us so in love. i never could have imagined that by the next october we would be done. im still so in love with him and my heart is so achey. when i read our old messages i cant help but think none of it was real. because how could he say so many loving and vulnerable and deep and intimate, beautiful things just to leave me. if you’re going through this too just know you’re not alone 💕

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3 replies

itchystrangertui2oa86mo ago

And it was real. In the moment he said those things, I’m sure he meant and felt them, regardless of whatever happened. Things change for different reasons (I.e. fight etc). But I would believe he meant what he said to you

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itchystrangertui2oa86mo ago

One thing I forced myself to stop doing was going through old messages. I unpinned him from the top of my message feed, archived our old chats, and put our pictures into a “hidden” album. Maybe one day I’ll be able to read back. But in order to heal, I think it’s best to avoid doing this if you can

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tatteredreaction066mo ago

I do the same thing. It’s self-torture but I can’t stop re-reading it all, as if I’m gonna finally find the answer somewhere in between the lines. Where do we go that will teach us how to walk away? Mine has made it look so easy.

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