Lost

I’m currently living with my ex. I have a one year old and a newborn baby. I have no car. No job. No family members who close to me and no money. He provides for me and my babies but he is not emotionally available. He never helps me with the kids and when he does it’s for a second and he feels like he that’s good enough. He never tried to fix the relationship, just always blames me for everything. We don’t even talk, we haven’t talked for months at that. I know the love was lost many months ago. I just feel worthless and not seen. He thinks being a mom is easy and his job is harder than mine. I never would compare our duties but I would appreciate the help especially if I just had our baby. I should be resting meanwhile I’m taking care of both babies and feeding them while ignoring my own take care needs. All he does is sleep drinks till he can’t wake up and then showers to then watch tv and leave me to manage the kids alone. I have no friends and no one to talk to. I want to leave and move with my babies but how if I have nothing.