5 months down the drain :/

We didn’t even date… He pursed me FIRST. I guess this is the classic tale of our generation with dating. I feel pathetic. He told me that he likes me, but he didn’t know if he could ever love me. We spent 5 months building a foundation and led me to think that we were going to date eventually. There was no build up as to how he magically woke up one day and decided to end things. It’s only been 4 days but it still feels heavy. I’ve gotten my heart broken so many times in the past and I really thought this was going to be different. I told him this is what I was scared of, and he still managed to string me along. I’m just not sure how to stop expecting a message from him. I blocked him on everything once he ended things with me, out of respect for myself, but he still has my phone number accessible, and I just don’t know if it’s silly to expect him to reach out. Mind you, we had built a routine of talking everyday, hanging out every week, falling asleep every night on the phone together. And in just 4 days my nervous system has just been all over the place. :( I just feel numb and don’t know what to do.