I broke up with him but my heart hurts so badly

We had been together for nearly 2 years and I loved him we lived together and have a cat. He never cheated physically but emotionally was abusive and cheated online he said he didn’t like kissing or more really so we didn’t have a relationship that made me feel secure or loved but I still want him in my life and I feel like my heart has been ripped out even though I did it and know it’s for the best. Advice please ♥️