Avoidant narcissist with victim mentality

Yes I broke up with my first “love” and he had a new girlfriend within three days. I found out years later that he was a chronic cheater. It is very difficult to move on when this happens. It was kinda traumatic for me, because it made me feel like he was faking it our whole relationship and that I must not be that good if he was able to move on that quickly. Trust that she sucks. The only way I was able to move on from the ex I mentioned before was blocking him so I couldn’t see his life anymore. No checking social media, no phone numbers, etc. you eventually forget them and recognize you deserve better. It’s so hard though. Sorry you’re going through this.

First off I’m so sorry that happened, that sounds awful 😢. I didn’t have the same experience as you, but I’d say I was codependent on my ex. What helped me after the breakup was learning where that codependency came from. In my case, it was a fear of being alone. I thought that being alone was somehow ‘bad’. That I couldn’t do what was ‘right’ while single. But I realized I was keeping my happiness / feeling of success external to myself. So I went through a process of realizing that all I can reliably do is my best in the moment, and if I do that, I should be proud of myself. And I don’t need a partner to do my best. Since then I’ve become less anxious / codependent bc the loss of a relationship isn’t a hinderance to me doing my best