When you split from your significant other, a lot of feelings rush in all at once. One of them is usually loneliness. Suddenly, you have to reestablish your identity, find new ways to spend the time you used to spend with your partner, and begin the healing process. For many people, navigating loneliness after a breakup is one of the biggest challenges.
Although life can feel empty without your ex, social connections (both new and old) play a big role in helping you heal. In fact, staying connected with others is key to battling the loneliness you’re probably feeling. As a bonus, engaging with others is also tremendously beneficial to your physical and mental health!
How Loneliness After a Breakup Affects Your Mental Health
Navigating the emotions of a breakup isn’t easy. The aftermath often casts a shadow of loneliness over the rest of your life that can feel suffocating. It’s important to know that feeling lonely isn’t just a passing emotion. If you don’t address these feelings, loneliness can quickly start to have a negative impact on your health
Recent studies show that loneliness and social isolation are tied to higher rates of anxiety and depression, heart disease, and even premature death. Those who identify as part of the LGBTQ+ community or as an immigrant are at higher risk for loneliness than their peers not in these groups.
Breaking up means losing an important piece of your social circle. Without someone there to act as your “default” conversation partner, sounding board, and confidant, you may feel like you’re on your own. Even if you have plenty of friends and family to talk to, the impact of losing a significant other can leave you feeling lonely for weeks or even months.
Strong Social Connections Promote Healing
There’s no “right” way to heal after a breakup. The biggest goal is taking care of yourself. Notably, research shows that increasing your social connections has a tremendous positive impact on your health. A study from Stanford University suggests that those with strong social connections experience:
- Lower levels of anxiety and depression
- Higher self-esteem
- Increased trust and cooperation
- Strengthened immune system and faster recovery from illness
Meanwhile, the CDC also says that social connection with others can help promote healthy eating habits, improve sleep, and prevent death from chronic diseases. The best part is, experiencing these benefits is incredibly easy. All you have to do is hang out with people you enjoy being around and participate in activities you enjoy doing.
How to Deal with Loneliness After a Breakup – 5 Practical Tips
The health benefits of connecting with others (especially after a breakup) are clear, and research shows that managing loneliness is a crucial part of the healing process. Fortunately, there are many ways to overcome the lonely feelings you may experience after splitting up with a partner. Everyone heals differently, so focus on the steps that work best for you.
1. Nourish Your Existing Connections
Although it can feel like losing a partner equals losing your whole world, chances are, you have other social connections in your life. Taking time to engage with others close to you, such as relatives or friends, can ease your post-breakup loneliness. Try to set up a regular “check-in” with someone you feel comfortable with. This will let you continue to engage in meaningful conversations and give you a sense of support as you heal.
2. Try New Activities
One of the best ways to stay connected socially is to meet new people. This can feel daunting, but trying new activities is an easy way to start. If there’s a hobby you enjoy, chances are your city probably has a local group of people who also enjoy it. You can also seek out new opportunities like cooking classes, hiking trips, or karaoke nights, where you’re sure to meet others who also want to connect. No matter what you choose, meeting people through new experiences is a great way to fill your social cup.
3. Use Technology to Connect
After a breakup, it’s important to monitor your technology usage carefully, especially social media. However, technology can be a helpful tool for overcoming loneliness after losing a partner. Look for virtual meetups or online communities based on your interests. Using technology to find like-minded individuals is a great way to deal with loneliness after a breakup—even if you don’t feel like leaving the house!
4. Make a Social Calendar
When you’re experiencing all the difficult emotions of a breakup, getting out of the house is often the last thing on your mind. Having a social calendar ahead of time keeps you in a good routine and makes it harder to convince yourself you’d rather sit around in pajamas and feel sad. Write down coffee dates with friends, game nights, and other events you want to attend. Then, when loneliness strikes, you have a pre-filled list of places to go and people to see.
5. Prioritize Your Mental Health
Loneliness isn’t “silly” or embarrassing. After a breakup, it’s perfectly normal to feel lonely. However, it’s important to prioritize your mental health to prevent loneliness from spiraling out of control. If you have trouble identifying or dealing with your feelings, talking to a professional could help. You can also use online resources like the Breakup Buddy app for 24/7 emotional support and exercises designed for healing.
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Conclusion
Knowing how to deal with loneliness after a breakup isn’t intuitive. Luckily, though, we humans are wired for social connection. Dealing with the loss of a significant other is difficult, but keeping yourself engaged with others and finding ways to connect is an important way to start healing and improve your physical and mental health.